Primary Friday: Road Trip

After the news of my grandmother's death on Tuesday, I felt called to be with my family.  Without a job or other obligation, there was nothing to hold me back.  On Thursday morning, I packed a bag, packed the dog, and drove straight up the nation from Austin to Wisconsin in one smooth motion.  It's a long, beautiful drive north through the plains of middle America, so between the moments of awe and soulful appreciation, I had a ton of time to think.

Where do I go from here?  Do I look for work teaching?  Should I go back to school?  Or do I take the divine hint and skip town in search of bigger and better things?  I'm not sure.  It's exciting to have this much freedom, so many options and seemingly endless possibilities.  It's the proverbial "crossroads."  Here I stand, facing the fork in the road.  I'm glad to be home, surrounded by those close to my heart as I ponder these big questions.  I am so fortunate to have such a wonderful network of support within my family.  In spite of all the ways in which we disagree, they have always been there for me and for that I am eternally grateful.

Between formulations of my future, there was ample time during the drive to practice counting the Primary series in Sanskrit.  It was a perfect way to fend off the highway hypnosis.  I led my imaginary students through the practice from Surya to Savasana, calling the postures and counting the vinyasas in real time.  It was amazing how vividly I could see and even feel the practice in my own body from start to finish while still strapped in my chair.  That Primary practice, it seems to have been etched in my DNA.

Naturally, the practice schedule has been interrupted with the moon day and travel.  I was on the road all day on Thursday and half the day Friday.  By the time the dog and I arrived at our destination, neither of us cared to do much but lie around and bask the in the affection of the family, so the weekly Primary was pushed back to Saturday.

It's colder here.  The house is drafty and even with a space heater placed near my mat, it's hard to stay warm.  In spite of this, I had a really nice Primary.  I thought my hips and hammies might have seized up from all the driving, but was surprised at the openness I found instead.  My shoulder, both shoulders actually, are still acting up, though the discomfort is less sharp than it was.  I wonder if it's got something to do with the 2nd series practice working around the joints in a different way.  I have been feeling a new stretch deep within the shoulders in Kapotasana and I wonder now what the relationship is between that stretch and the sensitivity I've had there for the past couple of weeks.  Could it be an opening?  Let's hope so.

As I type this post, I am trying to psych myself up for my first Intermediate practice since Wednesday.  I want the practice, but I don't want the cold.  It's so hard to get started when the chill drives deep down into the bone, I can barely muster the courage to disrobe to change into my practice apparel.  It's like taking a cold shower, the initial plunge is the hardest part.


  1. Hm, thanks for sharing and - still - all the best with your 'journey' :-)

  2. Thanks, Anne. This has been quite a year.

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