6.21.2013

Summertime

Forgive the extended absence.  School's been out for weeks, but I've fallen out of the habit of writing here and am having difficulty finding my stride.  Fortunately, with the summer solstice today that marks the midpoint of the year, I am inspired to reflect and share.

For those of you who wonder, I still do the Ashtanga.  Throughout the busy academic year, I woke pre-dawn to do my practice because I knew I'd be too tired later in the day.  Winter was hard, but now that summer is here, I am enjoying lazy mornings and sweaty second series in the afternoons.

Second has done a number on my body and continually threatens the shape of my mind.  I have been made more aware of weakness, more aware of change.  Surviving the seven headstands, but only just.  In all seriousness, every facet of the practice points me toward my own mortality with less and less subtlety or pause.  I live with the magnificent intensity of that.  It is not a crisis.  It's a meditation.

I made a simple resolution at the beginning of the year, and have faithfully kept it in mind:  "stay close to the truth."  With this mantra, I am making better choices.  I fail at it frequently, but certainly less frequently than I did one year ago.  As a result, I am happier, healthier in many ways, and profoundly less in conflict with myself.  This allows me to be warmer and more receptive of others.  It is a furious, benevolent cycle.

I am teaching a great deal this season and getting so much juice from my students.  Sunny days and their adventurous spirits inspire me.  But already, there is a creeping feeling that summer will be over soon, and I'll be back in the classroom, student-side, every morning rushing through an early practice in the dark.